I Doubt It

Doubt.  I don’t think I knew what doubt was in my early years.  Who doubts as a baby?  Who doubts as a toddler or even a young child?  I learned doubt when I first had to prove myself.  Probably by taking a test in school, or completing a particularly tough assignment.  Or maybe it was babysitting that child who wouldn’t stop crying.
Up until then, I was fairly certain of myself and my abilities.

However, fast forward a few years and getting married at 18.  I had just a moment of doubt when I received a phone call right before the ceremony from someone close to me asking me if I was sure.  Well, up until that point, I had been!  lol
I did go through with the ceremony and never looked back. For me, youth was confidence.  I was not a person given to much reflection or doubting.  I had my faith which at that point of my life had never been doubted, I had my marriage and my children, which I was sure of.

I think my moments of doubt have come the most in recent years.  Wondering if I should have done things differently.  Should I have chosen college instead of marriage?  Should I have waited to have children until I was older, more patient, wiser?  Should I have chosen different jobs?
So many doubts so much of the time.
I have learned to deal with doubt.  And I am regaining my confidence and my surety.
Using things I know I don’t doubt.

I don’t doubt I am a child of God.

I don’t doubt my husband and children love me and I’m so very glad to be part of their lives.

I don’t doubt that any career would have eventually taken second place to my family because that is and will always be where my heart is.

I don’t doubt that it’s a good thing I did have my children when I was younger as since I’ve aged, I’ve had some health issues that would have made it extremely difficult to have physically kept up with an active family and I have to say my patience level has actually lessened, instead of growing with age.  I’m laughing now, thinking about it.

I don’t doubt that I married the right man.  He is the man my Father chose for me and I’m certain of it.

So all those other doubts.  They’ll still crop up once in a while, but the main thing is I can deal with them because of the One I don’t doubt and His presence in my life.

I am where I am supposed to be.

Advertisements

4 thoughts on “I Doubt It

  1. Hey, Judy! I live your post. I have so much in common with you. Married at twenty, should have finished college 😟, had five kids, and like you, really, I believe it all turned out like it should. I’ll take you up on the offer. I’ll organize your craft room if I can play in it as I go.

    Like

  2. There are always those moments when I question the “might have beens”, but it feels good to know in your heart that the big things are right as they should be, doesn’t it? Blessings to you!

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s