I Doubt It

Doubt.  I don’t think I knew what doubt was in my early years.  Who doubts as a baby?  Who doubts as a toddler or even a young child?  I learned doubt when I first had to prove myself.  Probably by taking a test in school, or completing a particularly tough assignment.  Or maybe it was babysitting that child who wouldn’t stop crying.
Up until then, I was fairly certain of myself and my abilities.

However, fast forward a few years and getting married at 18.  I had just a moment of doubt when I received a phone call right before the ceremony from someone close to me asking me if I was sure.  Well, up until that point, I had been!  lol
I did go through with the ceremony and never looked back. For me, youth was confidence.  I was not a person given to much reflection or doubting.  I had my faith which at that point of my life had never been doubted, I had my marriage and my children, which I was sure of.

I think my moments of doubt have come the most in recent years.  Wondering if I should have done things differently.  Should I have chosen college instead of marriage?  Should I have waited to have children until I was older, more patient, wiser?  Should I have chosen different jobs?
So many doubts so much of the time.
I have learned to deal with doubt.  And I am regaining my confidence and my surety.
Using things I know I don’t doubt.

I don’t doubt I am a child of God.

I don’t doubt my husband and children love me and I’m so very glad to be part of their lives.

I don’t doubt that any career would have eventually taken second place to my family because that is and will always be where my heart is.

I don’t doubt that it’s a good thing I did have my children when I was younger as since I’ve aged, I’ve had some health issues that would have made it extremely difficult to have physically kept up with an active family and I have to say my patience level has actually lessened, instead of growing with age.  I’m laughing now, thinking about it.

I don’t doubt that I married the right man.  He is the man my Father chose for me and I’m certain of it.

So all those other doubts.  They’ll still crop up once in a while, but the main thing is I can deal with them because of the One I don’t doubt and His presence in my life.

I am where I am supposed to be.


4 thoughts on “I Doubt It

  1. Hey, Judy! I live your post. I have so much in common with you. Married at twenty, should have finished college 😟, had five kids, and like you, really, I believe it all turned out like it should. I’ll take you up on the offer. I’ll organize your craft room if I can play in it as I go.


  2. There are always those moments when I question the “might have beens”, but it feels good to know in your heart that the big things are right as they should be, doesn’t it? Blessings to you!


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